Live Rural? What's Really Needed?
Since I have moved back to a way out in the sticks place, like incredibly remote, 109 acres of nothing - thought I'd pass along what toys I have found that I just am thrilled to have and others that I need to buy badly. If you live in a city, maybe you won't ever need these. And no, this isn't a killer ninja tactical gun list either. Also going to tag on some personal messages at the end, so if you're not interested, no worries. You're an adult (I hope) and can decide for yourself what you read. If not, then grow some bollocks and make some decisions.
First thing - go get a big first aid kit. Second thing - get some training in how to use it. Out in nowhere, it's helicopter time if you chop yourself up. Ambulances can't go places where a monster F350 has trouble.
Get a big dog or a pair of them. I "inherited" a pair of Great Pyrenees and they are great for letting me know that something isn't right. First choice for me would have been three Rhodesian Ridgebacks, but since the GPs were free, they get the vote. It's like having a pair of ponies with teeth. One of them tore into a coyote a day or two back. Bad for the coyote. Sucked to be him. Also have my killer rat terrier, all five pounds of her. She takes care of the real big threats.
Get a shovel, a pair of Crescent or other US made fencing pliers and a pile of rope and stick it in your truck. Shovel is self-explanatory. You will get stuck - right in the middle of a road that has no bottom. Fencing pliers are so when you're way lost out on thousands of acres, you can let the barbed wire down (since you can't find a gate) and then (please) put it back up. Rope is for everything else. Hell, I learned a new knot from a cowboy I ran into just this afternoon while loading up some used furniture.
Find a big, giant knife. I got a Kukri from Amazon for less than $40. Had to take a file to it, but it's cheap and it works. Uses are endless. I love tomahawks and have a pile of them, but they are pretty much worthless for anything real. In fact, I am going to list my fancy VTAC tomahawk on ebay next week. Just can't find a use for them, but they sure are cool looking.
Buy the absolute brightest flashlight you can find. I thought a Streamlight Ultrastinger was it. Not hardly. Its 275 or whatever lumens won't reach for shit. Next one is the Surefire M6 —- when you need to see out in the flats, you really need to see. Badly.
Stop by an army surplus store for a couple of wool blankets. Always handy. James G over at Death Valley Magazine (see sidebar on the left for a link) recommended some lightsticks. Absolutely. Like he said, nothing sucks more than sitting in a broke down vehicle all night in the dark. Carry some big Milkbones for the crazy dogs you'll run into. Suddenly, you have a friend for life. Get on ebay and look for a current issue DPM British "smock" - their rain gear. These coats just rock. Ventilated, tough as nails and really waterproof. SAS (Special Air Service) beret would be an option. I have a beret but don't have the balls to wear it away from here, since I'm not SAS and don't want my ass kicked by a real tough guy.
That's all I can think of at the moment, but what I listed is important. Trust me. I have fucked up on each of these by not having them when I needed them.
And a personal note: thanks to Mike who sent me the blazer badge for SAS Rhodesia. Where the hell is "Stockton on Tees" England? Mike, wherever that is, I owe you a pint and when I go see Anthony, I am buying. Looks like I sign my final, final divorce papers tomorrow. I wish the very soon to be ex-wife all the best. My only advice to her is I hope her new guy isn't an asshole like me.
First thing - go get a big first aid kit. Second thing - get some training in how to use it. Out in nowhere, it's helicopter time if you chop yourself up. Ambulances can't go places where a monster F350 has trouble.
Get a big dog or a pair of them. I "inherited" a pair of Great Pyrenees and they are great for letting me know that something isn't right. First choice for me would have been three Rhodesian Ridgebacks, but since the GPs were free, they get the vote. It's like having a pair of ponies with teeth. One of them tore into a coyote a day or two back. Bad for the coyote. Sucked to be him. Also have my killer rat terrier, all five pounds of her. She takes care of the real big threats.
Get a shovel, a pair of Crescent or other US made fencing pliers and a pile of rope and stick it in your truck. Shovel is self-explanatory. You will get stuck - right in the middle of a road that has no bottom. Fencing pliers are so when you're way lost out on thousands of acres, you can let the barbed wire down (since you can't find a gate) and then (please) put it back up. Rope is for everything else. Hell, I learned a new knot from a cowboy I ran into just this afternoon while loading up some used furniture.
Find a big, giant knife. I got a Kukri from Amazon for less than $40. Had to take a file to it, but it's cheap and it works. Uses are endless. I love tomahawks and have a pile of them, but they are pretty much worthless for anything real. In fact, I am going to list my fancy VTAC tomahawk on ebay next week. Just can't find a use for them, but they sure are cool looking.
Buy the absolute brightest flashlight you can find. I thought a Streamlight Ultrastinger was it. Not hardly. Its 275 or whatever lumens won't reach for shit. Next one is the Surefire M6 —- when you need to see out in the flats, you really need to see. Badly.
Stop by an army surplus store for a couple of wool blankets. Always handy. James G over at Death Valley Magazine (see sidebar on the left for a link) recommended some lightsticks. Absolutely. Like he said, nothing sucks more than sitting in a broke down vehicle all night in the dark. Carry some big Milkbones for the crazy dogs you'll run into. Suddenly, you have a friend for life. Get on ebay and look for a current issue DPM British "smock" - their rain gear. These coats just rock. Ventilated, tough as nails and really waterproof. SAS (Special Air Service) beret would be an option. I have a beret but don't have the balls to wear it away from here, since I'm not SAS and don't want my ass kicked by a real tough guy.
That's all I can think of at the moment, but what I listed is important. Trust me. I have fucked up on each of these by not having them when I needed them.
And a personal note: thanks to Mike who sent me the blazer badge for SAS Rhodesia. Where the hell is "Stockton on Tees" England? Mike, wherever that is, I owe you a pint and when I go see Anthony, I am buying. Looks like I sign my final, final divorce papers tomorrow. I wish the very soon to be ex-wife all the best. My only advice to her is I hope her new guy isn't an asshole like me.
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